Monday, April 28, 2014

Free To Be Me, In Whatever Color I Choose

Three years ago I was completely befuddled by the gender assigned toy choices offered at McDonald's. Sent to buy food for a classroom celebration I had no idea that beyond choosing nuggets or burgers, I also had to assign to them gender specific, and hopefully correct, toys. I got it all wrong. The Gap makes it so much easier. No confusion at all when I walk in, boys clothing on the right, girls on the left, and please don't cross to the wrong side, simply not tolerated. Even my old workhorse L.L. Bean offers clear direction when shopping; Mary's flannel lined jeans are labeled boys because her flannel is primary colored, the girl's version being lined with a soon to fade pastel plaid. Pass.

McDonald's has recently agreed, at the urging of a determined teenager, that there need not be a distinction of boy toy or girl toy. Wonderful news! Now, while feeding our children processed and unhealthy food we need not force feed them gender stereotypes; who wouldn't see that as a victory? The comments associated with the article say otherwise. Ranging from " I'm gonna puke" to "This is a bunch of crap", the general consensus is that this type of effort to invoke change was unnecessary and a complete waste of time when far more pressing issues, say poverty and lack of freedoms, should be the focus. A curious issue to raise when the matter at hand is offering a child the freedom to choose the toy that they like best, without regard to what McDonald's has deemed acceptable, based on their sex.

For my part I applaud anyone who takes a stand and, beyond complaining (which is what I did when faced with this insanity), actually does something to make change happen. It seems there are those who feel that asking a mega corporation to stop pushing gender stereotypes onto our children is an inconsequential use of time, or that by not qualifying toys based on sex we are somehow creating confusion in our children. Because it is certain, if we don't level with them now, if we are not clear in directing girls to play with Barbies and boys to play with trucks (or the non toy video game level equivalent of which I know absolutely nothing about) then our children will grow up not knowing which way to turn when they walk into the Gap. If we don't tell them, how will they know?

Don't Dress Your Cat in an Apron


Although I must tell you his favorite toy
Is a little play stove with pans and with pots,
Which he really must like, 'cause he plays with it lots,
So perhaps he's a girl -- which kind of makes sense,
Since he can't throw a ball and he can't climb a fence,
But neither can dad -- and I know he's a man,
And mom is a woman and she drives a van.
Maybe the problem is in trying to tell
Just what someone is by what she does well?
Read more at http://www.songlyrics.com/marlo-thomas/my-dog-is-a-plumber-lyrics/#J4G2F561lJSqKFMK.99
My dog is a plumber. He must be a boy,
Although I must tell you his favorite toy
Is a little play stove with pans and with pots,
Which he really must like, 'cause he plays with it lots,
So perhaps he's a girl -- which kind of makes sense,
Since he can't throw a ball and he can't climb a fence,
But neither can dad -- and I know he's a man,
And mom is a woman and she drives a van.
Maybe the problem is in trying to tell
Just what someone is by what she does well?
Read more at http://www.songlyrics.com/marlo-thomas/my-dog-is-a-plumber-lyrics/#J4G2F561lJSqKFMK.99
My dog is a plumber. He must be a boy,
Although I must tell you his favorite toy
Is a little play stove with pans and with pots,
Which he really must like, 'cause he plays with it lots,
So perhaps he's a girl -- which kind of makes sense,
Since he can't throw a ball and he can't climb a fence,
But neither can dad -- and I know he's a man,
And mom is a woman and she drives a van.
Maybe the problem is in trying to tell
Just what someone is by what she does well?
Read more at http://www.songlyrics.com/marlo-thomas/my-dog-is-a-plumber-lyrics/#J4G2F561lJSqKFMK.99
Don't dress your cat in an apron
Just 'cause he's learning to bake.
Don't put your horse in a nightgown
Just 'cause he can't stay awake.
Don't dress your snake in a muu-muu
Just 'cause he's off on a cruise.
Don't dress your whale in galoshes
If she really prefers overshoes.
A person should wear what he wants to
And not just what other folks say.
A person should do what he likes to -
A person's a person that way.

-Dan Greenburg
 
Don't Dress Your Cat in an Apron, from the still wonderful Free to Be You and Me, which I love now as much as I did when it first came out in 1974. Created by Marlo Thomas who was shocked to find that books for children reinforced stereotypes of what boys and girls were supposed to be, she set out to put together a book that taught children they could be whatever they wanted. Sadly those pink and blue lessons still dominate much of what is published for children today, Free to Be You and Me still necessary, and enjoyed, after all these years.

4 comments:

Marion Williams-Bennett said...

Indeed, how will they know if we don't tell them?
Glad to have a friend like you.


Peg told Greg she liked to make things out of chairs
Greg told Peg sometimes he still hugged teddy bears
So they sneaked in the living room and piled all the pillows up
And made it a rocket ship to fly in
And the bears were their girls and boys and they were the astronauts
Who lived on the moon with one pet lion

Nellie said...

Our grandson was almost three when his baby sister arrived. When gifts would be delivered to the house, he would announce, "That one's pink! It's for Sister!" Of course, everyone knew by that time that his favorite color was yellow!:)

northsidefour said...

So nice to hear from you both!

northsidefour said...

So nice to hear from you both!

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